29 Jun

There and Back Again

You want to know what I really can’t stand? The fact that I’m never satisfied with myself. My mom told me a funny thing a week ago. She said I need to become friends with myself. And she’s right. I don’t like myself. Partially because I know myself, warts and all, and also because I can’t even measure up to my own standards.

And today, those standards have to do with body image. I always get one of two things: either people telling me I need to fatten up or people telling me they’re so jealous of how skinny I am. Both of these put incredible pressure on a person. Telling me I need to fatten up says to me I look abnormal. That I’m unhealthy. So I eat more, eat healthier. But it never does anything. I don’t fatten up, I just feel stuffed all the time, with a…

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